pictured: fresh twenties steph vs twenty-nine yr old entrepreneur steph

I've been saying for years that I cannot wait to be in my thirties. Now, having just entered the last year of my twenties, I find myself still eagerly anticipating this new decade. It's not that my twenties were bad—in fact, they were transformative. But I’m ready for what comes next. In this next decade, the opportunities feel endless… a healthy and committed love, the potential for a family of your own, and the career confidence gained through years of late nights in PowerPoint. Personally, I’m ready to move on to more peace, less struggle.

And that includes finding the courage to do more, experience more, and say more. (See what I did there?) 

That’s what I hope for all of you who’ve come to the saymore community. 

Embracing My Own Journey

As for me, I've never been one to experience life gently. A close friend once told me that I “make my life harder than it needs to be,” and I have to admit, they were right. But it's because I've always wanted to understand myself. I've put myself in many different situations to get to know myself better, whether that meant moving to new cities where no one knew me or exploring my sexuality and discovering that I'm queer.

The big moments like travel and career changes are significant, but it's the little moments in between that truly defined my twenties. They can be beautiful even in their despair. Here are a few core memories from my journey:

• Drinking with my friends–the right people–at a bar, and laughing when a girl I had a crush on asked for my Snapchat. I thought, what is this, 2012? (Or maybe I ditched Snapchat too soon?)
• The body dysmorphia that comes with womanhood…Is it my period? Is it my luteal phase? Or is it just me, and my belly has always been this soft...
• Converting to menstrual cups over tampons even though you are absolutely screwed if you get stuck in a porta potty while needing to change that thing.

These experiences, both the best and the worst, are all part of the natural ebb and flow of life. They’ve taught me that beginnings and endings are a constant, no matter your age. Here are some lessons I've learned along the way that I believe are timeless and relevant whether you're in your twenties, thirties, or beyond.

Disillusionment with the World 

It's normal to become disenchanted with how the world works. Realizing that systems often fail and that equality and justice are still aspirations rather than realities can be disheartening. But this awareness also empowers us to strive for better. A few years back, I remember my landlord keeping most of my security deposit for no good reason and feeling completely robbed. What was I to do - hire a lawyer?! That felt way out of my realm. Ultimately, I just had to cry a bit and cut my losses.

Heartbreak is Inevitable

Heartbreak, both platonic and romantic, often feels like the end of the world. The pain is real and intense, and there’s no set timeline for healing. It’s okay to take your time to move on and to feel deeply about the people in your life. Everyone heals on a different timeline. In my own personal heartbreak journey of lost friends and love, the book Everything I Know About Love by Dolly Alderton made me feel far less alone in the grief.

Existential Dread is Normal

We all experience moments of existential dread. Whether it’s the Sunday scaries or a full-blown anxiety attack, these feelings are part of the human experience. A walk, a good night's rest, a post on saymore, and a chat with a friend can work wonders, even if just temporarily. 

Changing Your Mind is Empowering

It’s powerful to change your mind, your job, your city, or even your perspective. Embrace the ability to evolve and make new choices. This is your life, and you have the agency to shape it. Find your favorite podcasts or books that empower you to try something new. I like the podcast, We Can Do Hard Things with Glennon Doyle. 

You Can’t Do It All

It’s important to recognize your limits. The pressure to do everything can be overwhelming. Allow yourself to rest and reject the productivity culture that leaves you depleted. Do your best and let that be enough. You’ll have some wins, like leading that big meeting with execs. And some losses, like butchering one of the exec’s names and sweating through your blouse. Don’t worry, you’re not the first and you won’t be the last.

Final Reflections

As I prepare to enter my thirties, I realize that I’m still learning and growing. Each decade brings new challenges and opportunities for self-discovery. The beauty in that? We can always start over. 

If you have any twenties fallacies or lessons to share, please let me know in the comments. This journey is something we all go through, and each story adds richness to the collective experience.

Take a look around, join our conversations, and let me know how you’re doing. 

Here’s to embracing imperfections at any age and constantly learning life lessons. Cheers to the next chapter!